As you might know, I lost a very dear friend at the beginning of summer. Her parents made the decision to give her clothes and shoes and accessories to me. I hardly kept anything because it was just too strange and sometimes too sad. Today I met my mother between Savannah and Tennessee in order to hand over Amadeus for 2 weeks (so he will be cared for while I am in Chicago.) My mother went to the trunk of her car and said “I went through some more of Sabrina’s things and I found a pair of shoes you might like.”
The last time I saw Sabrina was at Christmas. We went out one chilly night and decided to go shoe shopping. Sabrina was always a fashionista and needed to have the latest items on the shelf. I gasped at a pair of black, Jessica Simpson boots and she was in such awe that I actually smiled at a shoe with a heel, she bought them for me as a gift on the spot. I had to return the favor and Sabrina had her eyes on these JS purple and green pumps for the last month. She was always back and forth with herself and I finally grabbed them and bought them for her.
It was a wonderful last memory. It’s how Sabrina and I always were. Always shopping, always smiling, and always saying “I love you.”
As my mother opened the shoe box today there lay the JS purple and green pumps that I had bought Sabrina. I can’t stand the thought that when I was buying them I didn’t know they would be returned to me one day. I bought them so she could wear them. So she could match them with her newest top, and so she could go to the bar and try to talk to a cute guy in them.
And now there they are. Just sitting in my car. Un-worn. Completely in different context for the journey and use they were meant for.
Some days are rough without her….
-Lindsay
